Monday, July 20, 2009

Rain.

This post will be edited soon. Hoohaa.
My city was drowning, and traces of it can be seen everywhere you look. Also, we didn't have electricity for 48 hours, and tv still isn't working.
Details later p33pz.
Tata.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

A tag list I *actually* like.

1) Look at the list and put an ‘X’ after those you have read.
2) Tally your total at the bottom.
3) Tag a few people you think would enjoy sharing similar information about their book interests.


1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series – JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott

12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy (I became lazy halfway through.)
13 Catch 22 – Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca – Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch – George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House – Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck (Soon =D)
29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame(Never.)
31 Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis
34 Emma – Jane Austen
35 Persuasion – Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne
41 Animal Farm – George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney – John Irving
45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery (does the abridged version count?)
47 Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale – Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding
50 Atonement – Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi – Yann Martel
52 Dune – Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm – Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time – Mark Haddon.
60 Love in the Time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
62 Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov (Soon, again=D)
63 The Secret History – Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road – Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jone’s Diary – Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens
72 Dracula – Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses – James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar – Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons – Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal – Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession – AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas – David Mitchel
83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert(erm. Soon)
86 A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web – EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince – Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94 Watership Down – Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet – William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo (er..soon....)

Just 22.

A lot of these books are in my dad's collection, so I will get to reading them eventually. I feel illiterate now. Tsk=(
22 books in the 18 years I've been around.=(

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

So true.

Laila
I have found the answer to one of life's greatest mysteries.

Sanaa
which iss...?

Laila
Okay, I'd been waiting to ask this question for a long time, but I couldn't find the right person. But now I have:
Q. Why are boys so stupid?
A. They are not stupid. They pretend to be. (Why would they do that?) To lower your standards.
at first I was like WTF. But now I get it. ^^

Sanaa
Yes
see
theyre moronic
so they can get away with their bullshiz

Laila
ahaan. I've actually seen this behavior in men.
My dad, for example. He can be having a conversation with my mum but the second she mentions something he doesn't want to respond to, he pretends to have fallen asleep. I'm not kidding.

Sanaa
men. its an affliction that strikes all ages=\

Laila
mmhm. Actually the thing I hate most about men...
Is that they don't know when they want to compliment your or insult you. So they'll give you a mix of an insult and compliment and then leave it to your interpretation. and then if you ask them they give you some BS cryptic answer
Even if their relationship with you it totally platonic. The only man I've met who doesn't do this is my nana.

Sanaa
cause your nana is cool
the rest of them are twits

Laila
Me: -_--_-
D: Chinese eyes again!
Me: =/ is that better?
D: Definitely. it looks a lot more like you = )
me: is that a good or bad thing.
D: Whichever you want it to be.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Miss Pakistan World. Zomg.

Oh look. It's Miss Pakistan WORLD.
I was randomly browsing, and I came across this wonderful website. How very nice. Our very own beauty pageant. For Pakistani girls. Aww.

Now, I've never been a big fan of beauty pageants. While some people choose to believe that is the case because I do not resemble (and will never resemble) in any shape or form, a beauty pageant contestant, I beg to differ. And I can state more than a hundred reasons for that, but you can google feminism, and you'll find instant answers(or links that lead to them, anyway) so let us not waste our valuable time.

So about this website. The Miss Pakistan World pageant, from what I have gathered using my incredible investigative journalism skills (too many hours of boredom+immense desire to find something to mock/laugh at/rant about)is that it was started in 2002 for Pakistani girls belonging "mainly to North America and Europe", and apparently spread like a plague to the rest of (?) the world. The president of this event happens to be a certain Miss Sonia Ahmed, who hopes for a Modern Pakistan through..you guessed it... MISS PAKISTAN WORLD! *confetti moment*
Miss Sonia Ahmed with some douche called Mika Singh

Not only is the website cheaply made, they want to charge people $500 dollars for entry into a competition that reeks of utter uselessness. It's like Rizwan Beyg proclaiming "Oh I think it's absolutely wonderful that despite the recession the fashion family manages to get together and celebrate its creativity!". Delightful, a bunch of elitist twits getting together to check out clothes, buy clothes, talk clothes, dance clothes, eat clothes and everythingelseclothes. Which reminds me of this segment on the Nadia Khan Show (If you haven't heard of it, you are either living under a rock, or are blissfully unaware of a thing known as bored housewife syndrome, which touches all of us. Actively, or passively. Like secondhand smoke.)which shows what's going on with the middle aged yuppies in Dubai. They showed a "fundraising" dance party a few days ago, and it was, to put it quite succintly, revolting. Sweaty, frumpy, middle aged men and women doing weird bhangra moves on a dance floor. However, it was an amazing way to have them feel good about themselves (everyone looked ugly and frumpy, you see.) and extort them. Way to go fundraisers! Not only have you provided for the education of poor children in Pakistan, you have also given them footage to amuse themselves with while learning the important lesson of how not to behave like an absolute dumbfuck.

Back to Miss Pakistan World. Here you can find the contestants. Three whole years of them. Even the gallery is a bit shady, they all look like they're involved in the making of a pornographic film about psuedo Pussy Cat Dolls, as if the PCD weren't pornographic enough themselves. (Jai Ho feat. PCD, anyone?) I mean, what is this?

I used to be happy, not knowing such atrocities existed. No beauty pageants in/for Pakistan. What a wonderful world it was, even though it did put us in the same league as the Saudis with their stance on contests such as these. Not quite so drastic, but essentially the same. And look at this now. Enlightened Moderation too much? Much much much?
It's the tackiness of it all that's so shocking. You're not revolutionising the Pakistani society, you're just making it look tacky and disgusting.
I can see how this will get us respect from the rest of the world. I can already envision the investment funds pouring in, people dropping their warped image of pakistanis....

I see a better world. Oh yes I do.
*pukes*

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Days in the life of Jaahil.

Here is summer, June has passed its mid mark and as predicted, I have (yet again) succumbed to my role of universal uselessness. As mentioned in the previous post, I was going to look for an internship. I did look for said internship. However, the people at Dawn News seem to be a bunch of twits who do not understand the simple sentence " I do not want any money, I just want to get some work experience.". Either that, or they mistook me for an 8 year old who'd just get in the way while loitering about at the office. In a way I don't blame them. The did have poppies in their last advertisement. For those who do not know what the word poppies means, it's slang for the.. erm..."popular" crowd. Yes, the very same crowd of people who just happen, as I've mentioned in a different previous post, not to know what words like courtship and euphoria mean. Perhaps the folks at Dawn News are disillusioned with the youth of this country because of that particular incident. Or,they're just.. what's the word for it? Oh yeah. Douchebags. With 50 foot long iron rods up their asses. Whatever it is, hopefully it'll fix itself soon. Otherwise when they're crawling on their knees begging me to come work for them in the near future, I will kick them like any annoying ingrates ought to be kicked.

The other channel I wanted to apply to was Express 24/7. Yes, the same one that ripped off the SkyNews logo. That being besides the point, however. Express News does not have a website. What kind of a dysfunctional channel are they running? There is no website.WHAT IS WITH THAT? Furthermore, try getting their phone number from the numskull operators who sit behind those telephones you're connected to every time you dial 1217. After holding the receiver in your hand till it's painfully numb ( the hand. Not the receiver, an operator finally blesses your tele-presence by answering your call. I asked for the Express 24/7's number. They gave me some funny 0800 number which seemed quite dubious to begin with, and which, as I found out, would just not connect. It just wouldnt. I have concluded that not only are the people at Express News utter and complete rip offs, they are tech retarded and idiotic, with phone lines which do not function.

And the Dawn News people are snobs. S N O B S.

Now that the first rant is out of my way, I will proceed to the next thing on my agenda:
Food.
On the 16th we had my sisters (late) birthday party. My mother and I cooked loads of food. I cooked more, because I had (being the wiseass that I am) offered to cook more. So I cooked. Some guests didn't turn up, which didn't help matters because there was a lot of food. I mean, a lot. So we decided to save some for next day, and freeze the rest for later. All ok? Everyone's happy? Not quite, but alrighty. After the food was frozen, we sat back and relaxed, and I told my mother "Just because I can cook, does not mean I want to get married." I didn't just say that. Oh no. You see, my cousin had mentioned some funny rishta talk. And the rishta talk radars on my ears immediately picked up on the suspicious conversation. But more of that later. The issue here is: Food.

So the next day, the lights went out at around 6:30 pm. Lucky for me, since I had started puking my guts out half an hour ago. I don't know what happened, but I couldn't stop throwing up. And before there are any jokes about the food I cooked, let me tell you, everyone was in excellent health, the only person who fell ill was me. Horror, horror. No electricity, and vomit. Wonderful. My mother came back, I was taken to the doctors, yada yada yada. The point again is: food.

The lights were out for about 22 hours. My heart was breaking as every hour passed. All the food that I'd cooked. All that hard work going to waste. Half the food went bad. As for KESC. I hope it dies and goes to hell.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

.....And she's alive.

My exams are over. *does little jig*
Not really, but I have only one more and I don't have to study for it. Therefore *resumes little jig*

As determined as I am that this summer should not go to waste, I'm not sure how I'm going to go about "not wasting" it. Because the excitement of being in the library lasts for about two weeks before I get bored/annoyed/restless and consequently emo about my life, calling it a variety of unflattering things such as...pathetic. Stupid. Useless. Sad. Non-existent.

My life has self esteem issues, I think. Perhaps. Maybe.

But then I have things to do. Prepare for the SATs. Get an internship. Devise ways to avoid house arrest. Get through my summer reading list. Make fun of the president.

Which reminds me. I live near Bilawal House. The location is a visual haven for Zardari fans. And I'm not one. So everyday, I pass by this poster of Zardari. A picture of his beautiful face, under which is written "SOCIALISM IS OUR ECONOMY.". I've seen it a million times, it still amuses me to no end.

Since I have nothing very useful/coherent to say, I'll wander around the house till I find something to do. Or I'll listen to The Gossip. I love The Gossip. Awesome funky music.

I want to study in New York or London. Something of a sucker for big city life, I am.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

He kissed a boy....and he liked it....

mr bum fun says:
a fat atheist once kissed me
he was 40 and weighed 200 pounds

Sanaa~ says:
HE?
A GUY?
YOU NEVER TOLD ME!

mr bum fun says:
went to see a comedy thing.. 2 atheists performing their entrance was all energetic highficing people... we were sitting right in frtont of the tiny stage and he just grabbed my face and kissed me before going on hahahahha

Sanaa~ says:
HAHAHAHAHAAH ARE YOU SERIOUS?
hahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahah

mr bum fun says:
yes
this was a few months before we started talking
Sanaa~ says:

lol lol lol lolllllll
hahah
im soo amused

mr bum fun says:
so yah ive kissed a guy (h)

Sanaa~ says:
mubarak ho aap ko =p
*you kissed a guy before you kissed a girl*HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA

mr bum fun says:
omg youre right!


I love him. HAHAHAHA. <3