I hate A level admissions.
Hate them, hate them, hate them. I never, ever thought something as.. well.. I don't know.. unemotional? as A level admissions would get me depressed, but it has.

All. Thanks. To. My Beautiful. O level result, maybe.

This is the point where I stand in front of a mirror and shout at myself for being a failure in life, and then commit suicide. Seriously.

8 As, 9 As, 10 As, hell.. THIRTEEN FREAKING As.

What are people on?

Don't get me wrong, I really have nothing against anyone who did well, I've never been the jealous sort, not when it comes to my friends anyway. So I'm genuinely happy for how well they did. And I didn't really care up until the point I applied to School 1 and School 2.

Now the thing is, School 1 was my first choice. Has always been. And with the subjects I wanted, it should not have been a problem for me to get in, seeing how I had As in all of them, I didn't deviate from any available combination ( though i really, really wanted economics, but thought it best not to be a picky bitch lest it might hinder my admission process because there was no combination.)
And So I went on in life after submitting my form, thinking they'd notify everyone in due time.
Except that people started getting calls 2 days later.
People with the same result as mine, too.
And the same subject choices.
Which threw me into panic mode, and I still haven't understood why they didn't call me. And now I have done little except curl up in bed, refuse to talk to people or socialise, and curse myself for the stupid things I did in life.
Of course, there is apparently a lot of time left since School 1 is supposed to notify people latest by the 28th. Except that...

And on to school 2.
Now School 2 seems to love me. They sent me my acceptance letter the second day I applied. They're giving me all the subjects I want, and they're a lot nicer than the School 1 administration. BUT. There is a catch:
School 2 wants us to pay by the 23rd, and I want to wait till I have no hope left about School 1. School 2 wants to fill up its lovely shiny new campus, which is really, really out of the way for mum who keeps on threatening me that she will not drop me off, and hence I will sit at home and become a maasi and not do my A levels.

I have not felt this dejected or useless in a relatively long time.

Seriously.
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